RUMP
RUMP![]() |
Leader: Txec Róibeard Nordselva |
Founded: 27 September 2005 |
Disbanded:present |
Beliefs: Monarchist, conservative, derivatist. |
The RUMP is a Talossan political party. It was founded on 27 September 2005, six weeks after the abdication of King Robert I as a third-party alternative to the fiercely adversarial La Mhà Nheagrâ (MN) party of the former King and the ascendant Conservative Loyalist Party (CLP). The disputes between the King and the CLP had precipitated the abdication of the King, and bad feelings ran high in the Kingdom. The RUMP alternative was created with a "Talossa should be fun!" mandate, which influences the choice of a humorous party acronym.
The party name was decided during a discussion between party founders Baron Hooligan and Xhorxh Unamind, toying with potential party names having alcoholic acronyms, such as ALE and BEER. When Unamind suggested the Random Unilateral Movement (RUM), Hooligan added P for Party, and the RUMP was born. The third founder of the party was Cresti Siervicül.
Party Organisation
Party Leadership
The RUMP is currently led by Txec Rólbeard dal Nordselva. Hooligan led the party at its foundation, followed by Brad Holmes, Iustì Canun, Alexandreu Davinescu, and Litz Cjantscheir, who returned the leadership position to Hooligan in early 2012.
Party Whip
The RUMP party leader appoints a RUMP Whip, who publishes to the party members any position papers and provides guidance to members of the Cosa holding RUMP seats. The current Party Whip is Alexandreu Davinescu.
Mysterious Executive Coven of the RUMP
The party leader also appoints members to the Mysterious Executive Coven of the RUMP, which is charged with creating the party platform with input from all party members and oversight by the party leader, and with maintaining the activity of the party mailing list and formalising things like the party's secret handshake and other miscellany. The current membership of the Coven is:
- Martì Prevuost (Capo di tutti capi)
- Brad Holmes (Consigliere)
- Sir Mick Preston (Rival Underboss)
- Kari Byron (Honorary Gun Moll)
Party Newspaper
The RUMP publishes a newsletter named S4 to the membership. The newsletter is created and published by the party's press secretary Iáreþ Rodgarescu. The name of the newsletter is Talossan-language slang for "Maybe", but also stands for "Silly, Serious, Sexy, and Sleek" (and any number of other S-words that tend to cover the subjects of the newsletter).
Party Mailing List
The RUMP maintains a mailing list that permits for distribution of information from the leadership and provides an avenue for debate and discussion, open to all party members.
Party Traditions
Change of Name
Party tradition is that the party name (but not its initials) changes with each general election. The following names have been adopted:
- Random Unilateral Movement Party (36th Cosa)
- Restore and Uphold the Monarchy Party (37th Cosa)
- Revitalization Under the Monarch Party (38th Cosa)
- Remove Useless Ministers Party (39th Cosa)
- Really Unpopular Majority Party (40th Cosa)
- El Raßemblamaintsch Unusual dels Misfätsilor Pareßeis [The Unusual Rally of Lazy Delinquents] (41st Cosa)
- Restent Uçind ár Mocts Previösen [Still Using Our Previous Words] (42nd Cosa)
- Restent Utramaßind els Muiteux Progreßíus [Still fending off the many Progressives] (43rd Cosa)
- Rexhalistaes Unificheschti per el Monarc'h es els Popuis [Royalists for the Monarch and the People] (44th Cosa)
- Rexhalistaes Unenuxhinds pr'iensa Monarc'hã Panincestind (45th Cosa)
- Rexhalistaes Unificheschti pr'iensa Monarc'hà Perpetul [Royalists United for the Monarchy in Perpetuity] (46th Cosa)
RUMP Day Parade
The party holds an annual parade, inviting all members to post an electronic "float" on a specific forum thread on RUMP Day (2 February). The Party Leader posts the first and final float of the parade. The first float announces the theme of the parade and the final float "carries" the newly inducted "Gun Moll of the Mysterious Executive Coven of the RUMP" (usually a celebrity chosen by a vote of the party for the popularity of his or her posterior). The Gun Molls of the Party have been:
- Elizabeth Alexandra Mary, Queen of England (2005) [honorary]
- Miss Vikki "the Back" Dougan (2006) [honorary]
- Dawn French (2007) [honorary]
- Rosalie Anderson (Andie) MacDowell (2008) [honorary]
- Tora Sossaman (2009)
- The Memory of the Dear Departed Tora Sossaman (2010) [honorary]
- Sir Samuhel Tecladeir (2011) [due to a Y-chromosome-shortage in the party leadership, the Coven sported its first-ever male moll]
- Kari Byron (2012) [honorary]
RUMP Roast
On 2 August (six months between RUMP Days), the RUMP sometimes chooses a prominent citizen of the nation (never a member of the party) and roasts that person using humorous posts, always concluding with the final remark that the roastee wishes that he or she were a RUMPer.
Advocating for and Against Provincial Status for Péngöpäts
In each even-numbered Cosa, the RUMP typically authors and sponsors legislation that would make Péngöpäts into a province, and then, when the legislation reaches the floor of the Ziu, argues against it and ensures its defeat.